So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize