I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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