I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Four minutes until I can fart!
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
