So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
