Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
