Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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