Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
