We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
