Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize
