i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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