are you still at the devil's house?
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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