White coat. Heels.
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Randomize
