so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Randomize
