Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Randomize