he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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