So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
i think my cat just said my name.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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