Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Randomize