you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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