Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
