i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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