This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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