whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
