I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize