Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize