Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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