WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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