Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
