ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Randomize
