So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
it was like eating out sand paper
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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