she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
