i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
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