just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
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