You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Randomize
