My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Randomize
