how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
