dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
