he was CRYING into my vagina
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
