At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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