You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
