how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
