you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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