I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I have tasted many bathrooms
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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