Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
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