are you so shy because you have an std?
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize