Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
sarcasm needs its own font
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Randomize
