You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I have already put on my inside pants.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Randomize
