whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
