Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Randomize
