The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
