But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
