Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
do nipples grow back?
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize